July 21-ish – August 1st-ish

August 23, 2007

Here is the long awaited story of the second person whom I wish would just go to hell and get out of other peoples’ lives.

Desolate apartment

Note the disassembled UPS on the ground. There was no power.

So, I was in the uberghetto apartment – it turns out that Ken II and his wife were staying there, at his mom’s place, because their own apartment had the power turned off. I figure I could help, with my UPSes (one large APC UPS and one small Belkin job). We head over to their apartment, waythefuck across town, and I get some lights going. It sucks major ass but they say I can stay there as long as I want. Cool. A comfy couch is better than a rigid car seat any day, power or not.

Of course, his wife, we’ll call her Queen El Bitcho (or QEB for short), followed. She hates him. Very much. But she’s so sweet, she put on this nice facade for me. She was so nice, and I was genuinely wondering how a couple of white people (pardon my racism a bit here) could be stuck in such a ghetto shituation. So I totally bought it… she was so happy to see someone that would stand up for her and tell her lazy pain in the ass husband to get off World of Warcrack for 5 minutes to do something about the PG&E; (electric service). The bill was shuffled around and it turns out that his mom was who was paying for their apartment, and they were paying her. She (his mom) stopped paying, so their power got shut off. So for some reason, PG&E; wouldn’t put the damn power in their own name… and we were screwed. Few days go by and QEB starts getting “really” “comfortable” with me. She seemed from the start to be the cuddly, soft type. By that I mean fat and with impossibly low self esteem. She wanted to get away from drama back at the apartment, so I take her around here-and-there in my car and end up stopping at a park. Much wasted time spent talking and bullshitting there, including but not limited to me being on the receiving end of a long kiss. A few. And a bunch of intimate motions and mashing, etc… but we weren’t about to “do it” in the park. I’m sure she would, and she’d be the one to get into my pants… *shudder*

We go back to the apartment and sleep… it wasn’t until the next day that she decided to get into my pants. Needless to day, much booze ensued the next day. Ugh. Come to think of it, I can’t believe I let someone get into my head like that. I cared about her, but I didn’t care FOR her. And I tried to tell her that. Not that she cared. She wanted something “better”. I do find it impossible to believe that was her first time giving head… but uh… beside that. Moving on to the rest of the few weeks.

Laptop. And kid.

Laptop. And the kid that used it most of the time.

She has t… three kids? I think it’s three, if you count the really annoyingly small one. The two were the main ones. The boy, age fuck-knows, and the girl, aged slightly more than the fuck-knows how old boy. At one point I remembered but I cared to forget, so I did. I took one of them out to McDonald’s on a regular basis (since I couldn’t take them both in my car at once). Mostly the boy, since he’s more of a computer guy (as am I) that was into WoW like I was at the time too. So we played WoW at McD’s. A lot. The kids ended up leading to trouble, with me taking them to the pool and starting trouble when I wanted them to get out… shit like that. At least they stayed cool when I got massively shitfaced (vodka + brandy as shots = fucking WIN for HOURS).

Roomba battery rigged to inverter

Even a dead Roomba is still useful in times like this.

Every night I had to take the UPSes down to the laundry room to slide behind a washer and charge overnight. They provided us with internet at the apartment (via the cable modem) and lights at night. It was cool enough. I did some interesting things to juggle the batteries and tried to charge them using my car’s alternator (which, it turns out, isn’t even enough to keep its OWN battery charged). I ended up wiring the batteries wrong and ended up doing some sick perverted hybrid of series- and parallel-connections and I damn near blew something out (didn’t even realize it either, until I found 6.0 volts on one of the 12v batteries, and 15v on the other). Stupid distractions. But anyway, the Roomba battery had about as much power as the Belkin UPS, so that ended up being a good thing to use as well, considering as though the Roomba’s brush deck motor was toast anyway. Still need to replace that motor…

You meet some interesting people in the ghetto. One of QEB’s bestest-friends, Payne as she likes to be called (as I like being called Falcon), helped out with the weed part of the booze+weedfest that kept us somewhat sane during this fucked-up time. She introduced me to a magical device known as a “bong” (I’m not that naive, ofc) and we had a hell of a fun time. She’s a black girl but cool enough to listen to Linkin Park. It’s not often you meet a black person that doesn’t listen to rap – and that’s not racist, that’s just plain statistics. She was real cool. I wasn’t too particularly fond of her ICP (Insane Clown Posse) fetish, but other than the incredibly nasty things they sing about, I didn’t have anything against it either. Weird, but cool. She understood the Falcon thing the same way as I understood the ICP thing, but… I have a hard time explaining it in real detail with a straight face. Even I think it sounds crazy… but online, nothing is crazy. =)

Another interesting character to note would be The Great Gambling Bitch. Now this girl, she was kinda new to everyone here, so we didn’t know much about. But she needed a ride here and there, so I was happy to provide a ride. She gave me a few bucks for the ride, I was happy. She mentioned she might want a ride to Table Mountain (a nearby – 20 or so miles – casino) one of these days. That ended up coming up pretty soon…


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